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Sex after stroke
Many people feel worried about sex after a stroke.
They wonder: 'Is it safe to make love?'
In general, sex after stroke is safe. There is no evidence that making love will bring on another stroke.
Men may think: 'Will I be able to get an erection?'
This depends on the type of stroke you had.
Often, the nerves and the blood supply to the penis still work well enough to give an erection.
How a stroke can affect your sex-life
- You may feel unwell.
- Both of you may feel very tired.
- You may both feel anxious about the future.
- Your relationship may be under stress.
- You may have difficulty moving your body into a comfortable position.
- You may be depressed.
- If you are taking medication, this could affect your sex-drive.
What you can do:
Talk honestly with your partner if you can. Work out what's causing the problems.
Give plenty of time to lovemaking. Make sure you are both relaxed and not tired.
Enjoy touching, kissing and cuddling.
Massage, a warm bath and music can help you to relax.
Your partner can help by taking the lead.
Try out different positions.
Make sure your body is safely supported and comfortable.
If you lie on your weak side, you'll be able to embrace your partner.
Look after your health, as this will improve your sex-drive.
If possible, try to exercise, cut down smoking and drinking and keep your weight down.
Talking about sex can be difficult at the best of times. If you have aphasia it's even more difficult.
But it's important to try and talk to each other about how you feel and what you both want.
You can work together at finding ways to solve the problems.
If the problems continue, you can get help if you want to.
Getting more help
The Association to Aid the Sexual and Personal Relationships of People with a Disability (SPOD)
- Offers telephone counselling
- May put you in touch with a counsellor or sex therapist in your own area
- Gives advice on aids, appliances and treatments which might be helpful
- Produces a leaflet on sex after stroke
(020) 7607 8851
286 Camden Road
London N7 0BJ
Your GP
- May give you advice
- May refer you for help
- May change your medication
Speech and language therapist
- May be able to help you discuss the problems.
Relate Marriage Guidance
- Offers counselling
(0845) 456 1310 or local phone book
Herbert Gray College
Little Church Street
Rugby CV21 3AP
Occupational therapist
- Can help with bed and sleeping arrangements
The Stroke Association
- Produces a leaflet on sex after stroke
(020) 7490 7999
Stroke House
Whitecross Street
London EC1Y 8JJ
Different Strokes
- Produces a leaflet on sex after stroke
(0845) 130 7172
9 Canon Harnett Court
Wolverton Mill
Milton Keynes MK12 5NF
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